I am currently involved with a group of ladies who are going through Beth Moore's study on Daniel...WOW...I have always been sparked by Beth's passion, and challenged by the price she has paid to be where she is today.
About halfway through lesson 4 lastnight, I knew where I would end up. Once home, I unloaded purse and a few other items and hit the futon room. There was just SO MUCH going on in my heart! The video stirred and awakened a part of me that had been dormant for quite a while, and I am not even sure I can capture it in such a way to do it justice here in typed form.
One point was about loving the poor, and during discussion time I was reminded of the years in Orlando as part of a group called "Wilderness Cry" (Isaiah 40:3). There were about 11 core members which made up our band/ministry team. We had something going almost every day of the week...from nursing homes, to the youth ranch, jail ministry to the coffee house. Crossroads Coffeehouse on South Orange Blossom Trail. When we first started, there was an adult bookstore directly to the left of the building and a topless bar right across the street. We went down on Friday night, sometimes early enough to serve dinner plates, and when eatin' was done, they took up the tables and set up chairs, and we had CHURCH. We had some wild experiences in that little converted motorcycle shop...and memories that can still fan my evangelistic heart!
When I have more time, I will dig out some pics and post them, so you can see the faces.
What brought these memories flooding back was another lady sharing about her experience with a homeless gentlman, and how he had thanked her...for making him feel important...it reminded me that one of the biggest lessons I learned in my years at Crossroads was that we were not dealing with just poor people...we were not dealing with pitiful homeless people, or drunks or drug addicts...they were PEOPLE...created in the image of GOD...no less deserving of our love (if indeed our love is founded in Christ) than the most spiritual and prominent person in any church.
I think another thing that had already primed my heart was listening to Francis Chan the night before our study. Ed (who is currently a missionary to Haiti, and also the main one responsible for getting Wilderness Cry together, and also majorly influential in me even being a Christian) had encouraged me to listen to some of Francis' words on Youtube (check it out if you have time). He is a pastor in Simi Valley CA, and has alot of unconventional things to say about loving your neighbor...
Another part of the lesson was about Nebuchadnezzar's pride, and how that brought him down, even when he had the opportunity to change that course by acknowledging that the "Heavens do rule", practicing righteousness and showing mercy to the poor. Beth, on the video, very passionatley acknowledged where and who she would be without God, and over on the couch, tucked into my little corner, I was having a "deep calling deep" moment! I know where I have been, I know what God has done in my heart, and I know...(perish the thought)...I KNOW where I would be without HIM!!! It was a very humbling moment, but a catalyst for my futon time. I have two big responsibilities coming up, the first of which will be teaching Sunday school starting in a few weeks...and my heart cry was for it not to be one iota about me, and as Beth commented, to learn Nebby's lesson from the page, and not by experience...and I confessed that lastnight to the Lord...whether it is part of my dysfunctional childhood or whatever, I am aware of a need to be accepted, appreciated...to feel special...to be proud of what "I" accomplished...and that has so often interfered with what I may have been called to do. So let this new adventure be different, as I am honest with myself and seek to honor my GOD above all else!!
May you experience the call of JESUS today on a deeper level...
In Him - Bern
