Happy New Year!
I am facing 2023 with much anticipation.
As I wrote in a previous post, "new" carries so much hope and expectation. 2022 wrapped up with much transition in its wake. I am not a big fan of change, as it disrupts my flow of confidence and security. I am fluent in self-talk and have an arsenal of personal survival tactics. Not long ago, I half-jokingly commented to a friend that children of dysfunction often spend a good portion of their adult lives undoing the damage. Only half-jokingly because that is where I have found myself so often. But I am resolved to take bigger and bolder steps in the coming year. I don't mind being transparent to say that I will be exploring therapist options, and several other avenues of self-care. I have had conversations, listened to podcasts, and read books and articles that have cumulatively landed me with this fact: there is no shame in doing what you need to do to heal. As I have prayed so often, and God always seems to deliver the appropriate resource for the need, this is no different. I still can see Him in the details.
From Rita Springer, (parts paraphrased as it spoke to me)
"Everybody Has a Story"
"Psalm 139 says it best, that God knew us before we were even a concept. And if that is true, then God knew our destiny and He could see it all from the moment He formed us and held us, and then in some cases gave us over to humans who were not willing to relinquish their authority and responsibility to Him, and honor Him in raising children. God still sees a life full of His original intent. We can't just go back and remove the bad, and sometimes for many of us, those bad parental decisions and bad experiences are what He uses to get us to the platform of our balance and our freedom in Him. Healing recaptures the gifts and callings that He has already woven into the fabric of our being.
The rumor is true. When you were born, hell heard a rumor about what heaven was saying about you, and much of your life, hell has been trying to silence the rumor. Embracing the rumor silences hell's lies.
Most of us are raised with the baggage that our parents did not know how to unload and discard."
From Dr. Emily Anhalt
"Why You Should Try Therapy Yesterday"
"Psychoanalytic talk therapy uses the relationship between the therapist and the patient as a microcosm to understand all of the patient's relationships. The things you most need to understand about yourself will begin to happen in the therapy. The two parties can then unpack and understand what is happening. But ANY type of ongoing work that improves your mental health is therapeutic. Anything that helps you become more comfortable being uncomfortable. It won't be quick or easy and it's pretty tough to do alone. No world class athlete has ever achieved their full potential without the support of a coach. Why do we expect to reach our emotional potential by ourselves? Having that trained objective person reflect you back to yourself is a game changer! By doing this work on yourself, you are breaking the cycle of the unhealed. Anyone that you interact with in any way will be positively impacted by the work you do on yourself. Mental health often carries a negative connotation, when really, it should be considered mental FITNESS."
Crystal Sutherland's "Journey to Heal" resources (book, podcast, support group) and my ongoing connection to mentoring abuse survivors through the Journey to Heal study.
Plus many other nuggets I have accumulated from various sources.
In most cases, I can recognize when things are out of balance, but my desire is to understand better the hows and whys of my responses and emotions. It's actually exciting to think that possible! My foundation will remain intact, that constant reminder that God is my source. Ultimately, it is His "well done" that I am after! <3
If you have ever considered help, or toyed with the therapy idea, go for it! I hope to be pleasantly surprised, and maybe you will be too :D
Healing ME in '23
